Sibling rivalry is very normal and natural in growing up within a household that has more than one child. The endless arguments, tussling, and occasional fighting can be very stressful for the parents' end to keep up with. However, approaching these conflicts with mindfulness changes everything about how we approach and resolve them. By incorporating the practice of mindfulness, parents open their route toward a calmer, more compassionate environment, hence toning down tension and promoting close sibling ties. Here are some mindful tips to help parents handle sibling rivalry effectively.
One of the basic principles of mindfulness is to maintain composure, especially in times of conflict. So, the next time sibling rivalry hits, take a deep breath and center yourself before intervening. Your calm presence usually helps to de-escalate the situation and sets out a very good example for the child to follow. Remember, children tend to reflect the very same emotions that their parents express.
Active listening means that you listen to your children properly without interrupting or judging them at all. See that, when your kids argue, you listen to each child very carefully. Acknowledge their feelings, validate their experiences too. Such an attitude makes them feel well-heard and understood, and the problem to be solved is also clear—for a better solution.
One of the main causes of sibling rivalry is that often children cannot control their feelings against their siblings, which sometimes goes to the extent of hurting them physically or emotionally. You must teach them to be aware of and understand their feelings to make them comfortable enough to share these emotions with you. Apply mindful techniques to make them conscious of their feelings and behaviors regarding those feelings. Encourage the little ones to discuss what they are feeling instead of fighting or arguing with their sibling. You may engage your kids in this kind of practice using emotion graphs or through storytelling.
Empathy is an important part of mindfulness and does a lot to reduce sibling rivalry. Help your kids put themselves in their sibling's shoes and understand how each other feels. It is role-playing exercises that will develop empathy. Parents can teach children to be more understanding and empathetic, and the bond between siblings will grow into a more supportive and helpful one.
Mindful communication is clear and consistent. Set limits and norms of acceptable behaviour and make sure all children are aware of them. The rules should be consistently applied to maintain clarity of expectations to avoid misunderstanding and limit confrontation. Explain the reasons behind the rules so that they understand the necessity of them, and thus they can be easily followed.
Help your children speak their minds by creating a clear, open space where they feel comfortable talking about their problems. This can be commonly attained by regular family meetings in which everyone has something to say about their feelings, without the feeling that they are going to get disapproved of or punished for doing so. It is also a great way to create transparency and sort out issues before they develop into sibling rivalry.
Children are great imitators, so be sure to model mindful behavior in your interactions with them and others, especially when there are conflicts. Show them ways to handle disagreements calmly and respectfully. Your actions will be an extremely powerful example in teaching them the value of mindfulness and how to practice this in their relationships.
Mindful breathing exercises could also help the child calm down and get back on track in cases of conflict. Do this with your children as part of the family—teach them how to breathe deeply or do belly breathing. This way, it will become habitual for the kids to sustain mindful breathing during sibling conflicts.
Sibling rivalry can sometimes stem from feelings of competition or comparison. Through being mindful, one is encouraged to appreciate the individuality of each child with their varying strengths. Praise them for their various achievements and interests and not compare them at all. This will boost their self-esteem and devoid them of jealousy or rivalry feelings.
Engage in activities with your children that involve teamwork and cooperation. It may be anything like a yoga exercise or meditation together; the very idea is to make them feel like one. Cooperative activities teach children the outcome of teamwork is much superior to any individual capability and therefore respect each other's bond abolishing rivalry.